Recently David and I have butted heads over the issue of our home. Nearly 6 years ago we bought a great little starter home and it has served us well. However, since buying it we have added two children to our family and I have started to feel that it won’t be long before we outgrow it.
When we bought the home we thought it would be so wonderful if we never moved. We hate moving. We said that if we could get though raising kids in this house, then it would be a great home to just grow old in. Not too big, not too small. Well let me tell you, two kids have a way of making a house feel much smaller. I think being a stay at home mom has made the problem worse. Somehow being home all the time makes the house seem smaller. And of course Home & Garden TV doesn’t help at all. I find myself spending a lot of time daydreaming of more space, which I am convinced is the key to my organization problem, it couldn’t possibly be me, so it must be the house, right?
This daydreaming sometimes leads to real estate websites. That’s where the real problem starts because inevitably I’ll find “the perfect house” in a lovely country setting away from solicitors and our grumpy neighbor (I believe in loving thy neighbor, I’d just like to do so from a greater distance). In walks David, from a long hard day of work, to find me eager to tell him all about the amazing house I found. After a couple times of doing this I began to see that my findings did not excite him the way it did me. What gives? Isn’t it obvious that we are outgrowing this house and we need to start thinking about an upgrade? What I didn’t understand was that my dreaming of our next house was making David feel like I was no longer content with our home, that I wasn’t happy, and that he wasn’t providing well enough for us. (Remember I am a stay at home mom right now so this falls solely on him).
Oh no. That’s not what I was going for. I felt convicted. I hated to think of myself as discontent, that’s not like me, but all the evidence was there. I swallowed my pride and repented. I explained to him that my dreaming of a new house didn’t mean I wasn’t happy with our lives now; I’m actually living my biggest dream. We’ve given up a lot for me to be able to be home with the kids and the last thing I wanted to do was seem ungrateful. And I do think our house still meets our needs, I’m just ahead of myself thinking about the future. We sat and talked more and I realized that what I needed was a plan; I am a planner and work well with goals. In our talk we shared our dreams for our next home, talked about a time frame, and made some financial goals we can be working on in the meantime. Also, in this meantime, I can make sure I am not making this dream of a new house an idol in my life and that I remember how blessed I am. We now have a plan and I can contentedly dream within the parameters of our plan.
Philippians 4:11 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.”
Author: Cassia Hobbs
When we bought the home we thought it would be so wonderful if we never moved. We hate moving. We said that if we could get though raising kids in this house, then it would be a great home to just grow old in. Not too big, not too small. Well let me tell you, two kids have a way of making a house feel much smaller. I think being a stay at home mom has made the problem worse. Somehow being home all the time makes the house seem smaller. And of course Home & Garden TV doesn’t help at all. I find myself spending a lot of time daydreaming of more space, which I am convinced is the key to my organization problem, it couldn’t possibly be me, so it must be the house, right?
This daydreaming sometimes leads to real estate websites. That’s where the real problem starts because inevitably I’ll find “the perfect house” in a lovely country setting away from solicitors and our grumpy neighbor (I believe in loving thy neighbor, I’d just like to do so from a greater distance). In walks David, from a long hard day of work, to find me eager to tell him all about the amazing house I found. After a couple times of doing this I began to see that my findings did not excite him the way it did me. What gives? Isn’t it obvious that we are outgrowing this house and we need to start thinking about an upgrade? What I didn’t understand was that my dreaming of our next house was making David feel like I was no longer content with our home, that I wasn’t happy, and that he wasn’t providing well enough for us. (Remember I am a stay at home mom right now so this falls solely on him).
Oh no. That’s not what I was going for. I felt convicted. I hated to think of myself as discontent, that’s not like me, but all the evidence was there. I swallowed my pride and repented. I explained to him that my dreaming of a new house didn’t mean I wasn’t happy with our lives now; I’m actually living my biggest dream. We’ve given up a lot for me to be able to be home with the kids and the last thing I wanted to do was seem ungrateful. And I do think our house still meets our needs, I’m just ahead of myself thinking about the future. We sat and talked more and I realized that what I needed was a plan; I am a planner and work well with goals. In our talk we shared our dreams for our next home, talked about a time frame, and made some financial goals we can be working on in the meantime. Also, in this meantime, I can make sure I am not making this dream of a new house an idol in my life and that I remember how blessed I am. We now have a plan and I can contentedly dream within the parameters of our plan.
Philippians 4:11 “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.”
Author: Cassia Hobbs
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